It should start being a pretty good clue that my “healthy eating plan” (a.k.a. DIET) isn’t going well when I haven’t posted here in several weeks. It’s always exciting to come home from WW and post about a loss. It’s embarrassing to have to come back and post a gain. And that’s what I’ve been doing over the last several weeks—gaining weight instead of losing. But I’ve gotten to a point where I’m tired of the whole thing. I’m tired of “healthy” eating. I’m tired of thinking about how I’m going to fix tonight’s portion of lean meat and two veggies with perhaps a piece of fruit for dessert. Oh yay. I’m tired of salads with low-fat or fat-free dressings. I’m tired of the feelings of guilt I get just for watching a commercial about fried chicken on TV and craving it. I’m tired, in short, of not being able to eat anything I want and still have a smokin’ hot body (which I’ve never had, nor probably ever will).
Yes, I’m starting to cycle down into a depression cycle.
Part of this is because I stressed myself out so much in the month of June with trying to get the third contemporary romance novel finished before deadline. I gave myself the excuse of exhaustion to pretty much forget to try to make healthy choices in eating and eat whatever I wanted to. Which reawakened all of my food addictions—especially those to high fat and sugar. And now that I’m trying to get back on the wagon and I’m faced with breaking those addictions again, it isn’t coming easy—because I know the boredom that faces me in the food choices that I have when I’m following program.
I’m not the kind of person who gets excited over spring and summer because of all the fruits and vegetables that are in season. If I were, I wouldn’t be in this predicament to begin with. I have to FORCE myself to usually get at least two or three servings of fruits/veggies every day, much less the five I’m supposed to be eating.
Doing the core program on WW—eating basically a low-carb, low-fat, whole-foods/grains diet—is much easier for me than counting points. I have the list of foods that are “free” to be eaten on the plan, and if I stick to those (in moderate portions, naturally) I know I’ll lose weight. My problem is that I’ve gotten into such a pattern with food—either eggs or cereal for breakfast, soup or sandwich and salad for lunch, and a piece of meat with a couple of veggies for supper—that I’m totally bored with it, and that’s what’s making me fall off the plan with increasing frequency and slowly regaining the weight I’ve lost. Right now, I’m almost right back up to where I was when I went to Minnesota for the ACFW conference LAST SEPTEMBER. That’s right, ten months later and I haven’t netted any weight loss, because even though I’ve been down to 256 as a low at one point, I’ve yoyo’ed myself back up almost fifteen pounds from there.
So I’ve decided to start a new project. And if you read this in addition to being my friend on Facebook, I’m sorry that you’re getting this twice. I want to start a recipe repository here on the blog where I’ll post the healthy-living recipes you love that have helped you in your weight-loss (or just healthy living) journey. I need to add some pizazz to my diet so that I can make it a life-long change instead of just a diet. And I’m sure that’s something we all need help with.
So if you have some healthy recipes you’d be willing to share, send them to me at fabulousby40 (at) kayedacus.com and let’s get this cooking party started!